the supposed friends

it's just hard doing a conversation with some "friends". you don't get responses at all or the responses are not what you expect. am i being simplistic as wanting to get some positive response sometimes? don't really know what is wrong, can't really pin point the real problem either, if there is any. but it just gets very draining when having a conversation is so hard.

there are times when i question that, if friends are supposed to make you happy, welcomed and accepted, why are there those times when you feel that they don't understand you or not even making an effort in that friendship. strange.

it just gets tiring when a friendship is one way. you feel that you're giving too much and don't get anything in return. but that triggers a question - who asked you to.

no one.

no one actually did, didn't it? so why am i pushing my way through and forcing it? maybe i'm just tired and i need to get some rest. i don't know. but i know that i'm really mentally exhausted with how things are going on, one or two times i guess i can shrug it off but i think it's been a few times too many. i guess i need time to sigh and exhale for a while.